do the (football) pools

To gamble on the outcome of a sporting event, especially a football (soccer) game. Primarily heard in UK. Come on, we're doing the pools. How much are you in for? I don't know how people do the football pools regularly. Any time I've bet on a game, I end up too stressed about the outcome to enjoy the game itself. I can't do the football pools anymore, boys. I can't gamble away my paycheck again.

fantasy football

An online activity in which people "draft" American football players, typically from the NFL, to form their own fictional teams. They then earn points for the actions their players take in games in real life. How many points does your fantasy football team get if one of your players scores a touchdown? Our fantasy football draft is tonight at 7:00—don't forget! Why would I join your fantasy football league? I don't even like watching football in real life!

football's a game of two halves

proverb In football (soccer), the fortunes of each team can reverse dramatically between the two 45-minute halves of play. Used especially in sports reporting and analysis. Barcelona has overcome a four-goal deficit to defeat Real Madrid. Football really is a game of two halves. A: "The home team seemed to be firmly in control for the first half of the game, but then the away team evened the score in the second half." B: "Well, football's a game of two halves, as they say." I know we have a sizable lead, but I'm still nervous—there's plenty of time left, and football's a game of two halves!

like a monkey fucking a football

vulgar slang Said of someone who is attempting to do something in a very clumsy or ineffectual manner. I'm just watching the two of them trying to carry this heavy dresser down the steps. It's a wonder they haven't been crushed yet—they look like a monkey fucking a football. The first time I stepped up to bat, I felt like a monkey fucking a football, but I'm really starting to get the hang of it now.

See also: football, fucking, like, monkey

like a monkey humping a football

vulgar slang Said of someone who is attempting to do something in a very clumsy or ineffectual manner. I'm just watching the two of them trying to carry this heavy dresser down the steps. It's a wonder they haven't been crushed yet—they look like a monkey humping a football. The first time I stepped up to bat, I felt like a monkey humping a football, but I'm really starting to get the hang of it now.

political football

A problem or situation that causes an argument between different political parties, often in an attempt to gain an advantage. It didn't take too long before the issue of property taxes turned into a political football for the candidates.

political football

Fig. an issue that becomes politically divisive; a problem that doesn't get solved because the politics of the issue get in the way. The question of campaign contributions has become a political football. All the politicians who accept questionable money are pointing fingers at each other.

a poˌlitical ˈfootball

an issue or a problem that causes argument and disagreement and that different political groups use to gain votes: It is sad that education is still being used as a political football, instead of action being taken to improve it.