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spank the monkey

slang Of men, to masturbate. A: "Why is he all embarrassed today?" B: "Oh, his crush walked in on him spanking the monkey. How horrifying is that?"
See also: monkey, spank

(brand) spanking new

very new; just purchased and never before used. My car is spanking new. Look at that brand spanking new car!
See also: new, spanking

(brand) spanking new

mod. completely new; brand new. Look at that brand spanking new car!
See also: brand, new, spanking

spanking new

See also: new, spanking
References in periodicals archive ?
This week's episode entitled "Crime and Punishment" deals with the child-rearing issue on the policy on whether or not spanking is an acceptable form of punishment for erring children.
They all then contradicted themselves and said that while they felt they did benefit from the spanking, they would never spank their own children.
Washington, April 16 ( ANI ): Researchers have found that spanking was far more common than parents admit, that children were hit for trivial misdeeds and that children then misbehaved within 10 minutes of being punished.
It is my belief that brutal physical punishment or constant hard spankings may only stir up such feelings in children that eventually, when these same children become parents, they may tend to act in a similar fashion with their own children.
A recent newspaper article concerning the spanking of children indicated volumes concerning the philosophy involved in such punishment.
Tremendous social pressure will cause them to postpone spankings until safely in their homes.
The article went on to retail worn-out arguments for banning spanking completely.
I challenge the finding's author to study children under 6 who receive spankings along with moral character training and a happy, stable home life.
Their On the Run (Dance Theater Workship, September 22-October 2, 1994) is a series of wild and crazy female stereotypes with a twist: little sisters who purposely misbehave because their dad's spankings turn them on, or suburban housewives who spend days getting soused, fantasizing themselves as (oafish) fan dancers, then sobering up for their husbands.
Between courses, a 30-year-old secretary ordered spankings from the $20 ``Special Fare'' menu for both her brother and her boyfriend.