pissed as a newt
(as) pissed as a newt
slang Very intoxicated. Primarily heard in UK. When I got to the pub, you were as pissed as a newt. Do you remember anything that happened last night?
pissed as a newtBRITISH, INFORMAL, VERY RUDE
If someone is as pissed as a newt, they are very drunk. She swore never to drink again. Hah! Pissed as a newt the first night she came back. Note: Other nouns such as fart or parrot are sometimes used instead of newt. The last time I saw him, in Glasgow, he was as pissed as a parrot.