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Related to crutch: crutch palsy

(as) awkward as a cow on a crutch

Very clumsy or uncoordinated. When my toddler was first learning to walk, she was awkward as a cow on a crutch. He'll never make the basketball team—he's as awkward as a cow on a crutch.
See also: awkward, cow, crutch, on

(as) funny as a crutch

Not funny or amusing at all. Yeah, cancer is about as funny as a crutch, huh?
See also: crutch, funny

*awkward as a cow on a crutch

 and *awkward as a cow on roller skates
very clumsy or off balance. (*Also: as ~.) When Lulu was overweight, she was awkward as a cow on a crutch. Tom will never be a gymnast. He's as awkward as a cow on roller skates!
See also: awkward, cow, crutch, on

*funny as a crutch

not funny at all. (Sarcastic. *Also: as ~.) Your trick is about as funny as a crutch. Nobody thought it was funny. The lame joke Ron told was as funny as a crutch, and we all yawned.
See also: crutch, funny


1. n. a car. (Streets.) That’s one fine crutch you got here, Bud.
2. n. a device to hold a marijuana cigarette butt. Here’s a crutch so you can finish your smoke.


n. a police car. (see also crutch = car.) Hey, bro, there’s a p-crutch behind you.
References in periodicals archive ?
The primary aim of the study was the design of a modular and adjustable ptosis crutch for MG patients, which could be produced using low-cost manufacturing methods.
Brachial plexus neuropathy following axillary crutch use most commonly involves posterior cord with some involvement of other cords also and usually gets resolved in 8 to 12 weeks with discontinuation of crutches, oral steroids and methylcobalamin and rehabilitative therapy.
He later returned, picked up the crutch and started swinging it the woman and through the ceiling tiles.
They then clashed again outside and Stevenson wielded his crutch.
Since crutch use changes the center of gravity, the crutch tips were placed in standardized positions on the force platform such that the velocity of sway was calculated within a theoretical center of gravity with the different types of crutches.
Ms Des Landes added: "It's not usually the case that someone deliberately holds on to a crutch.
It made me wonder if the single crutch that other street people can be seen carrying in this city has another purpose, as an aid to begging perhaps, and has no actual link to a physical disability.
He told paramedics that a masked mugger had blasted him in the crutch in a bungled robbery.
An aggressive crutch-wielding patient visiting the Northdale Hospital outpatient department (OPD) ended up in police custody early in December after he attacked the hospital's public relations officer (PRO), knocking him unconscious with his crutch.
Keep the fashion police at bay with Broken Beauties, which provides orthopedic chic with arm slings, crutch pads, and cast and crutch covers in eye-catching prints.
This company offers standard rubber lab stoppers and crutch tips that can be customized to fit individual specifications.
The crutch design was born three years ago out of a Cooperative Research and Development Agreement between the company and the U.
I could use a hand getting that crutch over there, Kenny.
Then I jumped into his empty seat as he carried on dancing, then my foot hit something under his chair, I looked down and seen there was a crutch under his seat.