(as) thick as two short planks

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(as) thick as two short planks

Remarkably stupid, dimwitted, or obtuse. I smoked a lot of marijuana when I was in high school, so I turned out thick as two short planks by the time I finally graduated. Jen's new girlfriend is very nice, but she's as thick as two short planks.
See also: plank, short, thick, two
Farlex Dictionary of Idioms. © 2015 Farlex, Inc, all rights reserved.

(as) thick as two short ˈplanks

(informal) (also (as) thick as ˈshit taboo, slang) (British English) (of a person) very stupid: Because she’s a model, people assume she’s as thick as two short planks, but she isn’t. OPPOSITE: (as) bright as a button
Thick is the opposite of thin and can also mean ‘stupid’ in informal language.
See also: plank, short, thick, two
Farlex Partner Idioms Dictionary © Farlex 2017
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References in periodicals archive ?
"But sometimes he's as thick as two short planks and it's the wife in the audience who is miles brighter."
"But sometimes he is as thick as two short planks and it's the wife in the audience who is miles brighter."