be (as) thick as two short planks

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be (as) thick as two short planks

To be remarkably stupid, dimwitted, or obtuse. I was as thick as two short planks back in high school. Good thing I straightened out in college. Jen's new girlfriend is very nice, but she's thick as two short planks.
See also: plank, short, thick, two
References in periodicals archive ?
I'm hoping they're not going to stay in our slum areas and find London actors to do awful exaggerated Brummie accents that continue the stereotype that we are as thick as two short planks.
When are TV bosses going to realise that women like Kelly who look spectacular but are as thick as two short planks don't make good presenters?
How dare she blame parents for criminals and drug dealers and say we are as thick as two short planks.
IF ever we needed proof that - with a few notable exceptions - boxers are as thick as two short planks, here it is.