Peter Barlow back on the booze, Carla about to be conned, scorned Sally vowing revenge on cheating rapist Frank, oily Lewis sliming his way back into Audrey's heart.
Ex-Celts considering a return include Peroni Glavin, Alfie Cognac, Lex Bailey's, Saki McNamara, Owen Archreekin' and Alky
Which, in terms of denying her affair with Corrie's top alky
, she was.
Luckily for the alky
funeral director, local rugby legend "Dick the Kick" decides to, er, "kick" the bucket and give business a boost.
As the massed ranks of Corrie's constant funeral and marriage attenders cowered in the pews, cuckolded alky
Peter rounded on his blubbing bride and her bit on the side .
Blind Boy Boatclub said: "UB40, Blind Willie McTell, Up On Your Bike Mike, Hot Billy and the Noise Crew, Alan Alky
and the Dole Quene, Dancing Diarmaid and the Craptones - they're good.
I'll get the first round in with Dick Advocaat, Shandy Walker, Don Bevvy, Alky
McCoist, Mortalled Weighorst, Blootered Blisset, Scott Sleverin and Colin Nished.
Actor and director David Threlfall can't be seen on the estate, but with calling-cards like this lying around, the spirit of drugaddled alky
Frank is never far away.
Prior to the resurgence of a reformed alky
from Govan, Patsy Palmer was about to take the award for best TV comeback.
POP: Lacombe' FRENCH LEAVE: Le Guen' WAIT FOR IT: Smith
For infinitely superior soap nonsense, tune into Coronation Street where cobblestones alky
Peter Barlow has hit the bottle again.
To be honest, though, while it may sound like a dish fit for an alky
, I should point out it's nothing more than a touch of vodka (Neil couldn't even taste it) and the real flavour comes from the smoked pancetta, peas, tomato and cream.
Starring not-as-funny-as-he-thinks-he-is Stephen Mangan, this laughfree BBC2 dirge is My Family with an alky
Russ, remember, introduced the kilted, braying, gingernutted Scottish alky
stereotype who the English loved and no-one in Scotland actually recognised.
It's like your local pub's resident alky
finding the gas mains and threatening to strike a match if you bar him.