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A useless or trivial argument, competition, or comparison. Whenever Jeff and Tim hang out, they always get into this pissing contest about who's the bigger sci-fi fanatic. If you two are quite finished with your little pissing contest, do you think we might get back to work now?
dick measuring contest
vulgar slang A petty competition among individuals (usually men) who are trying to prove that they are better at something than the others. You're all good golfers, OK? Now can we please stop this ridiculous dick measuring contest? I hate how these political debates always seem to turn into a dick measuring contest, with each candidate trying to outdo the others.
1. Lit. [in games] a situation where one team fails to appear for a competition. It was declared no contest because the opposing team was stuck in traffic out on the expressway.
2. Fig. a situation where the winner-to-be of a contest is obvious even before holding the contest. It was no contest. The wrestler was so big and strong that no one could have defeated him.
See also: contest
not going to win any beauty contests
Fig. homely; ugly. Fred isn't going to win any beauty contests, but he's smart and considerate and he does well at his job. This old truck of mine is not going to win any beauty contests, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.