by (one's) (own) bootstraps
By one's own efforts to improve one's life or circumstances, rather than relying on others. After I declared bankruptcy, I had to haul myself up by my bootstraps and rebuild my financial standing. Poor people just need to drag themselves up by their own bootstraps, huh? Well, that lacks quite a lot of nuance, don't you think? I know you're heartbroken by this breakup, but you just have to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and get back out there into the dating scene.
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