(as) slow as molasses

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It runs as slow as molasses! Come on, Becky, you're slow as molasses back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late if traffic keeps moving as slow as molasses.

(as) slow as molasses in January

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. (The addition of "January," which is among the coldest months in the Northern Hemisphere, serves to intensify the meaning, as molasses is especially viscous in the cold.) This old laptop my dad gave me takes forever booting up, and then it runs as slow as molasses in January the whole time I use it! Come on, Becky, you're slow as molasses in January back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late if traffic keeps moving as slow as molasses in January.

be (as) slow as molasses

To be exceptionally slow or sluggish; to not be fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It's as slow as molasses! Come on, Becky, you're slow as molasses back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late—traffic looks to be slow as molasses!

be (as) slow as molasses in January

To be exceptionally slow or sluggish; to not be fast at all. (The addition of "January," which is among the coldest months in the Northern Hemisphere, serves to intensify the meaning, as molasses is especially viscous in the cold.) This old laptop my dad gave me takes forever booting up, and then it's as slow as molasses in January the whole time I use it! Come on, Becky, you're slow as molasses in January back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late—traffic looks to be slow as molasses in January!

be slower than molasses

To be exceptionally slow or sluggish; to not be fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It's slower than molasses! Come on, Becky, you're slower than molasses back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late—traffic has been slower than molasses!

be slower than molasses in January

To be exceptionally slow or sluggish; to not be fast at all. (The addition of "January," which is among the coldest months in the Northern Hemisphere, serves to intensify the meaning, as molasses is especially viscous in the cold.) This old laptop my dad gave me takes forever booting up, and then it's slower than molasses in January the whole time I use it! Come on, Becky, you're slower than molasses in January back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group. We're definitely going to be late—traffic has been slower than molasses in January!

big around as a molasses barrel

Very large and round. If you keep eating fried food all the time, you'll be big around as a molasses barrel soon enough. How on earth am I going to move this crate that's big around as a molasses barrel? I like skinny dorks myself. I'm just not attracted to the linebacker types who are big around as a molasses barrel.

like molasses

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It runs like molasses! Come on, Becky, you're moving like molasses back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group.

slower than molasses

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It runs slower than molasses! Come on, Becky, you're slower than molasses back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group.

slower than molasses in January

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me takes forever booting up, and then it runs slower than molasses in January the whole time I use it! Come on, Becky, you're slower than molasses in January back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group.

*big around as a molasses barrel

Rur. very big around. (*Also: as ~.) He ate till he was as big around as a molasses barrel. The athlete's chest was big around as a molasses barrel.

*slow as molasses in January

and slower than molasses in January

very slow-moving. (*Also: as ~.) Can't you get dressed any faster? I declare, you're as slow as molasses in January. The traffic on the way to the concert was slower than molasses in January.

slow as (slower than) molasses (in January)

Extremely dilatory. This simile is American in origin, dates from the midor late nineteenth century, and is a vivid one for anyone who has ever tried to pour cold molasses from one container into another. “He’s slower than molasses,” wrote J. W. McAndrews (Monologue, ca. 1880).