January

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slower than molasses in January

Exceptionally slow or sluggish; not fast at all. This old laptop my dad gave me is a piece of junk. It's slower than molasses in January! Come on, Becky, you're slower than molasses in January back there! Pick up the pace and keep up with the group.
See also: January, molasses, slower

It'll be a long day in January (when something happens).

Rur. Something will never happen. (There are fewer hours of daylight in January.) Tom: Maybe this will be the year that Mama treats herself to a nice vacation. Jane: Are you kidding? It'll be a long day in January when she does that! It'll be a long day in January when that car dealer gives an honest price.
See also: January, long

*slow as molasses in January

 and slower than molasses in January
very slow-moving. (*Also: as ~.) Can't you get dressed any faster? I declare, you're as slow as molasses in January. The traffic on the way to the concert was slower than molasses in January.
See also: January, molasses, slow
References in periodicals archive ?
Gulf Return and Coastal Return, produced 58 (3%) and 18 (1%) hours of rainfall, respectively, during these Januaries.
Spending typically drops significantly in January after the holidays are over, but the brighter economic projections in the latter half of 2014 and the improvement in consumer confidence could start 2015 on a higher spending note than in previous Januaries, especially if low gas prices persist into the new year.
And there has been a couple of these systems which brought exceptionally high rainfall, some of the highest Wales and south England has seen - it's been double the average rainfall for January and one of the wettest Januaries on record.
For this, his 3rd album, the artist teamed with co-producer/drummer Petur Smith (The Januaries, Jason Falkner), and calls upon contributions from Rusty Anderson (Paul McCartney), Joshua Grange (Dwight Yoakam), Rick Boston (Low Pop Suicide), Kalle Gustafsson Jerneholm (The Soundtrack Of Our Lives), and Ludwig Boss (Boss, Ray Wonder).
There were 21 signals passed at danger (SPADs) in January 2002 - 12 fewer than in January 2001 and 17 fewer than the average for the past six Januaries, the Health and Safety Executive said.
They know that if there's one thing that can cheer even the gloomiest of Januaries it's bagging a new bikini and imagining yourself swanning around that beach in July.
Two Januaries ago, Washington athletic director Barbara Hedges was looking for a coach to replace Jim Lambright, and Neuheisel was at the top of her wish list.
I'm more confident in the Lane County housing market this January than I have been for any of the past five Januaries.
Their activities underlined another truth about the 104th that seemed unthinkable two Januaries ago: Control of the Congress that begins in January is up for grabs, thanks to voters' qualms about the GOP's agenda of cutting the budget, taxes and the size of government.
Not only are the Cascades dressed like a hula dancer at a winter carnival, Eugene is enjoying one of its warmest Januaries on record.
That's the earliest the soggy southern Willamette Valley might see a break from what will go down in the books as one of the wettest Januaries on record.